Just over a week ago I had a nice, long, catch up chat with
my good friend Kim. It had been a substantial amount of time since we'd talked,
but like I knew it would be, it was fine; exactly as if we'd never skipped a
day without talking to each other. It's a comfort, a constant, and I never take
that kind of connection for granted.
In the middle of our call Kim said, "I graduated from
high school 25 years ago today." I responded with, "Wow, you're
right. That means 25 years ago at this time I was traveling back to Victoria
with my family." Kim then said, "That means that we've been friends
for almost 25 years."
When I moved back to Victoria after living in Ottawa for 4
years everything had changed. My friends had grown up, some of my friends had
grown apart, and many of my friends had grown away from me. I was adrift in sea
of awkward circumstance that honestly, I had never considered would be a
possibility. I had assumed that everyone would be so excited to see me! That
people I'd known since I was 5 and professed to have missed me in the letters
I'd received over the 4 years would be happy I was back.
This was not the case. They were pleased to see me at first,
but then, they weren't. No one was mean, no one was cruel. We just didn't fit
anymore and it was with a very heavy heart that I began the second chapter of
my life in my home town. Everyone had made plans for their future, but I wasn't
in them.
Everyone that is except for Wendy. We'd stayed close during
my stint in the nation's capital and while I was a bit chocked when I found out
she was going to go to Simon Fraser University in Burnaby instead of going to
University of Victoria with me, our friendship remained intact. And before she
headed across the Juan de Fuca straight she gave me a great gift: Kim.
Kim and Wendy had become close friends in high school.
Before I moved back to Victoria I'd heard about her from Wendy. I was a bit,
not going to lie, jealous of this Kim
as she'd been the special friend who'd got to experience the ups and downs of
high school with Wendy while I only got to hear about it letters and late night
phone calls.
There's lot of hair in this picture... |
However, when I finally met this Kim at the movies (Beauty and the Beast) in August, a couple weeks
before University started, all my jealousy melted. I liked her immediately. She
was fun, smart, and kind. Plus she laughed at my stupid jokes, which is always a
good path to my heart. I hoped that we would be friends, but wasn't sure if
we'd meet up and figured our paths would only cross when Wendy came home from
university on holidays.
The first day of University was nerve wracking to say the
least. I was scared and nervous about my future. When I hopped on the city bus
to the big school, I thought was going to be sick. But then I saw a familiar
face: Kim. She was sitting alone, looking a little anxious and invited me to
sit with her. For the entire bus ride to UVic, I talked her ear off. I don’t
remember what I talked about. I just remember being so happy that I wasn't
experiencing my first day alone and I a strong feeling that we were going to
become good friends.
And we did. By the time Wendy came home for Thanksgiving, we
were inseparable and anyone would think Kim and I had known each other for
years. Many Friday nights, I would be found watching taped videos off of Much
Music at Kim's place. I don't know how many times we watched those World on Edge, or Bryan Adams, or Roxette
videos, but they never got old. We bonded over them and movies like The Shawshank Redemption and Gleaming the Cube. (Kim worked at video
store. It rocked!
Oh my...how we swooned. |
After our first year at UVic, we both decided it wasn't for
us and for the next while, we kind of lived parallel lives. We both took a year
off, we both moved to Ontario a year later, we both went to college in Ontario
where we both met Ottawa boys whose fathers worked for Bell Canada and knew each other. (The fathers knew
each other, not our boys).
Both of us married our Ottawa boys and settled in B.C. At
first Kim was in Victoria and I was in New Westminster, but not long after, she
was there too and moved to apartment not very far away. We both got pregnant in
2001 and had daughters only 6 and half months apart.
However, it wasn't in the cards for our paths to continue
running side by side-ish. In 2006, my family and I took the plunge and moved
across the country to Miramichi where my husband had found a job in his field
of animation. As Kim and I hugged goodbye and wiped away tears, I felt the 15
years of friendship and memories fill my heart to the breaking point. She had
been with me through so many tough times, happy experiences, embarrassing
scenarios that I'd care to not remember, and here she was again. Supporting me
and helping me to embrace a future that was as uncertain and scary as it had
been that day I'd seen her on the bus to UVic.
Kim and I in Ottawa, July 2014 |
The last 10 years have gone by in the blink of an eye. Our
kids have grown, we've suffered losses, celebrated gains and while we haven't
experienced these things together, they haven't created a distance between us.
We have grown up, but not grown apart and I think in 25 years one of us will
say to the other, "We've known each other for almost 50 years."
Kim, this one is for you.
beautiful memories and I am glad you are still best of friends and that's the way it should be
ReplyDeleteLovely! So happy to have been the connector in such a long lasting friendship! Cheers to 25 year (and our 35 year) friendships!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for such kind words and wonderful memories! Cheers to our next 25 years of friendship! xo
ReplyDeleteSuch a wonderful blog. Thank you for sharing, Cin. I know that type of special friendship and it truly is a blessing.
ReplyDelete